Here is my Mary Sue test for ThunderCat fanfiction. Yes, this is a yet more altered version of the one I helped with on Cheeezey's site. I think that I fixed a lot of things, added a lot of things, and did the points differently. I have spoken to a few people and they think the test is fair. I think so too. I have also included the points breakdown for a dozen or so of my characters.
For your information, a Mary Sue (or Gary Stu) is a character often written into fanfic, although they can be in original stories, too. I had tons of them when i was younger. Mary and gary are characters written into a story that are projections of the author, or what the author wants to be. Some are annoying as hell, some are decent, fun characters. it all depends on how they're written. For a more extensive page on what a Mary Sue is, go here:
There is a point value after each
question. For each one answered "yes", you gain
the amount of points listed. Total them all up and use the
chart below to see how your character fares.
Note: If some questions are N/A (like the “does everyone go into mourning over your character." one If the character does not die, this is an N/A answer) assume it to be a “no” answer.
Note 2: If a specific set of characters is mentioned in a question, it is because they seem to be the most popular characters, and the ones that people become infatuated with.
Note 3: Some questions will call for taking points away. Some questions could either indicate a Mary sue, or just the opposite, depending on how they are written.
Note 4: Thanks to Servali and Purrsia for helping me hash out the details of the test! And thanks to Cheeezey for posting the page of Mary Sues to begin with.
1: Character Basics
Is your character named after you?
10 points if it’s your real name, 7 if
it’s a middle name, internet name, or another secondary
name.
2 if it's a name you would choose for
yourself but is not yours.
Is he named after someone you know or admire?
3 points
Is the name unusual?
1 point
(if not a human character, then go on a
case by case basis. Would someone of that race conceivably
have a name like that?)
Is the name suspiciously close to that of a
show character?
(examples: Cheetar, Tygro, Wilycat)
3 points
Is his name in the title of the story?
(if an Rping character, N/A)
5 points
How long did you spend choosing your
character’s name?
1 point per entire day spent deciding
Would you name a child or pet this name?
3 points
Is this character the basis for others?
1 point
Is he the same gender as you?
1 point
Is the character human, or the breed of
cat or Mutant you’d like to be?
1 point
Is the character a mix of two different
species?
1 point if it is two show races, 3 if it is
human and one of the show races.
(take 1 point away if he’s a total
mutt)
Is the character a mix of different
tribes/clans, etc within the same species?
(tiger/lion, or ice Lunattack, Psy
Lunattack, etc.)
1 point
Is he a teen or in his early 20s?
1 point
Is he any other age but looks like
a teen or someone in his early 20s?
2 points
Is he your age or the age you’d like
to be?
1 point
Is the character unusually pretty,
handsome, or cute?
2 points
Does he have a noticeably unusual eye
color?
1 point.
Does he have a strange (for his species)
skin or fur pattern?
(if the character is human or other races
without weird colors or patterns, then noticeable scars,
birthmarks, and tattoos count).
1 point
Do you make a plot point of the fact that
he has beautiful hair or eyes?
1 point
Does he have an unusual accent, or one
that does not match his species?
(like a Thunderian with a Plundaarian
accent)
1 point
2: Character background and other information
Did the character have a traumatic
childhood?
(abuse, slavery, neglect, abandoned, low
caste status, poverty, surviving something horrible, etc.)
2 points, 3 if the abuse was sexual
Is he related in any way to a show
character?
3 points if it is Tygra, Lion-O, Cheetara,
Alluro, Jackalman, Jaga, Grune, or Chilla; 2 points otherwise
Was/is the character adopted or did/does
he otherwise live with people who were/are not his/her parents?
1 point
Is he a member of a species, tribe, or
clan not in the show?
(like ocelots, hyenas, hyperaudio
Lunattacks, or totally different life forms)
1 point
Is he the last surviving member of his
clan?
1 point, 2 if his clan is a show clan
Is he the future or current leader of his
clan?
1 point, 2 if the clan is a show clan
Does he have terrible guilt about
something in his past? (click all that
apply)
1 for the guilt,
1 if it's over something silly
1 if the show characters work to convince
him that it wasn't his fault
1 if the character still agonizes over it
while everyone's trying their darndest to help them overcome it.
Are his moral/religious/cultural beliefs
and traditions the same as yours?
1 point
Does he do a lot of the same things as
you for fun?
1 point
Does he do the same kind of work as you
do?
1 point
Does he have a psychosis, or major quirk
that is a large part of you?
1 point
Did he have an unusual or significant
birth?
1 point
Was he born in or start out the story in
the Cats’ Lair, Tower of Omens, Skytomb, or the Black
Pyramid?
3 points
Does the character have a twin sibling?
1 point
Does the character sing well, draw well,
act well, or play a musical instrument well?
1 point for each that applies
Is he an excellent pilot, or does he pick
up this skill with ease?
(land, air, space, and water vehicles
count)
2 points
Is the character a mentor or nanny for a
major show character?
1 point
Is the character royalty or nobility of
any kind? (all
that apply)
3 for being royalty
1 if he does not start the storying knowing
he's a noble
2 if he rules an entire realm or
planet.
Is he a mix of two Psy clans, or two
strength-based clans, ect.?
2 points
Does he have crossed loyalties?
(such as a Mutant living with the
Thunderians as one of them, or a Thunderians who sides with
the Lunattacks)
1 point
Was he banished from his family, clan, tribe,
town, etc.?
2 points
3 if he was banished but was innocent
3: Powers and Abilities
Is your character more cunning than the
kittens, stronger than Panthro or Amok, more powerful than
Mumm-Ra, etc.?
3 points
Is he all or part Mage?
1 point
2 if he is originally unaware of this
Does he have Psy powers?
(twin-type telepathy counts)
1 point
2 if originally unaware of it.
Does the character have Psy or Mage
powers, but is NOT of a clan that normally has them?
3 points
Does he just know things for no apparent
reason?
1 point
Can he psychically heal someone by
touching them, or by simple thought?
2 points
Do animals instinctively like this
character?
1 point
(take 1 away if the animals are only bugs
and other such "undesirable" creatures)
Is the character unaffected by normal
weaknesses of his species?
(such as Thundranium, or in the earlier
episodes, Mumm-Ra’s reflection)
3 points.
(Note: Take 3 away if the
character does not have the advantages of being part of the race
but still has the disadvantages. (Examples: A character who is a
Psy Lunattack who cannot seem to learn any Psy powers, ever, in
your entire story series. A character who is a skinny panther who
can’t fight his way out of a paper bag.) Take away only one
point if the character eventually does get the benefit, anywhere
in the story series.)
4: Plot Points
Note: For child characters, substitute things like ‘falling in love with’, and ‘sleeping with’, ‘marrying’; with things like ‘loving as a father’, or the ‘child living with the show character’, or ‘being adopted’, etc.
Do any of the show characters find your
character highly attractive?
1 point
2 if another show character sees this as a
threat
Does everyone end up liking your character?
1 point
Does the character end up falling in love with
and/or having sex with Lion-O, Cheetara, Tygra, Alluro,
Chilla, or Mumm-Ra?
3 points
Does the character end up falling in love with
and/or having sex with another recurring character from the show?
2 points
Does the character end up falling in love with
and/or having sex with one of the one-hit wonders from the show
(like Mandora, or Captain Bragg, or the
Astral Moat Monster...not necessarily only appearing one time,
but aren’t regulars)
1 point, and if the answer was Captain
Bragg or the Astral Moat monster, then you’re just sick!
Does the story end with or revolve around the
character’s wedding to said show character?
1 point for ending, 2 for revolving around.
Is it attended by the ThunderCats (or ranking Mutants, Lunattacks, etc.)?
1 point, 0 if the ThunderCats are there
only grudgingly.
Does he end up being a ThunderCat/ranking
Mutant or Lunattack?
3 points, 4 if the other ThunderCats, etc.
attend the annoitment
(Note: If your character started out as a
ThunderCat, etc., don’t add these in addition.)
Is the story primarily about your character?
4 points
If not, is the character introduced in the
first page of the story?
2 points.
Does he meet the
ThunderCats/Mutants/Lunattacks, etc., and become friends with
them after some tension and suspense?
2 points
Does he befriend a villain despite the fact
that he's a good guy?
2 points, 3 if the villain is Mumm-Ra, 0 if
your character turns sides instead of the villain.
(This can be reversed, if you are writing
about a bad guy to start with. In that case, put in Lion-O
for Mumm-Ra in this question.)
Is your character reformed into a good guy
thanks to your character
(or into a bad guy if he starts out good)
1 point
If the villain goes bad again , does he retain
at least some goodness thanks to your character?
1 point
Does your character save the day or
someone’s life?
3 points.
6 if the character dies to do so, and 5 if
he almost dies.
If he dies, does everyone go into mourning?
2 points
Is he resurrected by the end of the story?
4 points
7 if another show character sacrifices
himself to bring yours back, but only five if it's someone like
Dr. Dometome or a Warrior Maiden...you know, a very minor
character.
Does he end up living at the Lair, Tower,
Skytomb, Castle Plundaar, or Black Pyramid?
2 points
0 if he was there to start with.
Does he have a weapon that rivals the power of
the Sword of Omens?
(or Sword of Plundaar, Book of Omens, or
any other highly important item from the show.)
4 points,
5 if it’s got a similar name (like
Staff of Omens, or Eye of Plundaar)
Does he carry the actual Sword of Omens or
Plundaar, rather than the show’s original owner carrying it?
(Things like the Book of Omens and other
highly significant items count!)
3 points
4 if the weapon’s original owner is
still around
1 if the character is heir to it, but does
not have it by the end of the story.
Does he have a weapon that mirrors another show
characters’ weapon?
1 point
2 if it has the same powers
3 if it has better and/or more powers
Was/is this character’s weapon or item of
importance given to him by Jaga or Claudus himself?
2 points
Does he have a ship or vehicle that is the same
or very similar to a show vehicle
(ThunderTank, Ratstar, etc.)
2 points,
3 if it’s a modified or improved
version.
5: You and your shadow (real life questions)
Note: As before, with child characters, substitute thigns like sex and marriage for adoption and family-type love.
Is your character someone you would be friends
with in real life?
1 point
Do you think that people who read the
story should like your character?
1 point
If people do not like your character, do
you take it personally?
2 points
Is this a character you would want a
sexual, romantic, or family relationship with?
1 point
Do you ever pretend, just to yourself,
that you are the character with all his powers, abilities,
weaknesses, etc.?
2 points
4 if you tell people about it or do it in
public.
Do you role-play often as this character?
2 points
Have you made an RPG based on your character?
6 points
Did you (or do you plan to) make a custom
action figure or figurine, etc. of him?
(having someone else do it for you counts)
1 point
3 if you've paid money to have someone else
do it.
Is he the main subject of most of your
artwork, or have you asked someone to draw this character out for
you?
1 point
3 if you've paid money to have someone else
do it.
Do you start out your custom in the real
world?
1 point
3 if he comes from the same town or state
as you
Do you bring the
ThunderCats/Mutants/Lunattacks/Mumm-Ra into the real world with
your character?
2 points
5 if it is in your state
or area of living.
Do you meet your character and/or the
show characters?
6 points
9 if you go back with them or they end up
stuck in your town
10 if they decide to stay of their own free
will.
Do you intend to write one or more
sequels to this story?
1 point
5 if the sequel involves or revolves around
resurrecting your dead character
Do you wish you were a
ThunderCat/Lunattack/Mutant like your character?
1 point
2 if you wish you were your
character.
230 points available
0 –
24 Likely not Mary Sue/Gary Stu
25 – 34 Borderline
Mary Sue/Gary Stu. Potential is there.
35 – 60 Mary
Sue/Gary Stu
61+ This indicates that you are way out in
the realm of self-insertion, and might want to rethink your story
and character.
Here are the breakdowns for some of my characters. (I know some won’t be recognizable to most, but for those that do recognize, they might be interested.)
Ocellon 51
Sonarion 24
Orion 23
Siwatu 16
Nokoa 10
Hyiri 12
Xairon 8
Akterex 10
Mtoto Paka 16
Kaseko 18
Saber 18
Kambihi 19
Kitwana 18
Zirali 17
Note: Remember, not all Mary Sues are bad. I have one that fell into the Mary Sue/Gary Stu range, and was almost in the last category of point allotments, but everyone who has read him likes him (at least that have told me) and for a couple of those people it’s their favorite of my fanfics. So just read things through and try not to make the story too annoying or insulting to the original show characters and the fans of the show. :)
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